The following

follow

ˈfɒləʊ/

verb

gerund or present participle: following

1. go or come after (a person or thing proceeding ahead); move or travel behind; go after (someone) in order to observe or monitor them; strive after; aim at; go along (a route or path); (of a route or path) go in the same direction as or parallel to (another); trace the movement or direction of.
2. come after in time or order; happen after (something else) as a consequence; be a logical consequence of something; (of a person) do something after (something else); have (a dish or course) after another or others during a meal.
3. act according to (an instruction or precept); conform to; act according to the lead or example of (someone); treat as a teacher or guide.
4. pay close attention to; take an active interest in or be a supporter of; (of a book, film, programme, etc.) be concerned with or trace the development of; track (a person, group, or organization) by subscribing to their account on a social media website or application; understand the meaning or tendency of (a speaker or argument).
5. practise (a trade or profession); undertake or carry out (a course of action or study).

Following is a word we hear an awful lot in church, that's why I decided to look for the actual meaning of it, the definition. I wanted to know: what exactly is Jesus asking when he asks us to leave the world and what we are doing to follow him? And what does it mean to say yes to that? 

Mostly when we do say we will follow him, I think we imagine having the company throughout life and our endeavours of this miracle maker, this genie to grant us all our wishes. I know, I know, we very hardly say so: we say that we would never deny him, that we will follow him anywhere. So let's look at the definition more closely: 

1. go or come after (a person or thing proceeding ahead); move or travel behind; go after (someone) in order to observe or monitor them; strive after; aim at; go along (a route or path); (of a route or path) go in the same direction as or parallel to (another); trace the movement or direction of.

Following means not coming first, and it means not making decisions for ourselves. This clashes directly with the idea in our society that we are the ones making decisions about ourselves, and that being happy is our top priority - and therefore, you should only do things that make you happy. Then this counter-cultural view presents itself: The religion of those who chose to leave their autonomy to discover a new identity in Christ. 

2. come after in time or order; happen after (something else) as a consequence; be a logical consequence of something; (of a person) do something after (something else); have (a dish or course) after another or others during a meal.

Understanding we are not a cause for anything, but we resign to be a consequence of God's creation and interaction with the world. This is what our entire existence becomes: a consequence of love. Not only do we follow, but we believe that without him, we would not exist at all. 

3. act according to (an instruction or precept); conform to; act according to the lead or example of (someone); treat as a teacher or guide.

Following means changing to act according to what we see, to what we hear, to what we are taught. Learning is hard, and many mistakes are made while learning most concepts. Sometimes we forget, even after we learn, and have to revisit the most basic concepts. It means understanding that, well... you don't understand. It is resigning to be an eternal student in a world of self-professed post-docs. 

4. pay close attention to; take an active interest in or be a supporter of; (of a book, film, programme, etc.) be concerned with or trace the development of; track (a person, group, or organization) by subscribing to their account on a social media website or application; understand the meaning or tendency of (a speaker or argument).

It means looking out more than into yourself, your priority is now to see what happens in the world and what is coming from the interaction of the One you are following and the rest of the world, and finding out which way is best to respond to that - and, as a consequence of the previous items, the response isn't what you think is best. 

5. practise (a trade or profession); undertake or carry out (a course of action or study).

You know when you take up a profession how much it changes you? People see you by your profession, and your profession changes you and the way you think and approach the world too. It's not just something you are on the side, it's something that changes who you are all the time. It's something you carry out all the time. Christianity does that too, it changes the way you see God, other people and yourself. It rearranges so as to make you not conform with the ego-selling context we are inserted into, it transforms your mind and it becomes not only something for sundays or holidays. 

As I saw a friend being baptised this week, a song was being sung: a song that someone one day in India was singing, as he and all of his family were executed because of their faith. 

"I have decided to follow Jesus, 

No turning back, no turning back

The cross before me, the world behind me,

No turning back, no turning back

Though none come with me, still I will follow

No turning back, no turning back." 

I think of how many times I sing these words or say beautiful verses without thought of the implications in real life of these things. Sure, it's beautiful to hear or to say. But is it beautiful to live everything that may come from this? Is it easy? I like to believe there is beauty in self resignation, however hard it may be. 

"Is it true? Is it worth it?" I sometimes wonder. Then I think of the first 12 that were called to follow - 10 of them were executed (crucified, crucified upside down, sawed in half, burnt to death...), one committed suicide after putting himself before whom he followed and the last remaining died in exile. One might argue that that is proof as to why it is not worth it - but I think if they knew Jesus, and walked with him everyday for 3 years, listened to his words, saw how he lived, and believed to the point of suffering and death, well then they did believe - and they could have been the ones with most arguments against, these were witnesses with first hand accounts. And they thought it was worth it.
Perhaps I am a fool, most likely most times I will not have the faith or strength to live it - but hopefully one day I have found to follow through with the words spoken to another king, but that could very well be spoken to the Heavenly one:

"As surely as the Lord lives, and as my lord the king lives, wherever my lord king may be, whether it means life or death, there will your servant be." 

2 Samuel 15.21